I make the title a question because I don’t really know. I’ve been cutting myself since I was eleven. It’s the only thing I know that gives me some relief and calms me down.
But I want to stop. Not because I’ve come to some sort of realization or anything of the sort, but because I’m in love with someone and this person doesn’t like when I cut. I mean, if I can’t stop for me, I might as well do it for someone else, right?
But it’s shown to be extremely hard when you want to slash yourself open and you’re not able to. Because that’s exactly how I feel right now: I want to Slash. Myself. Open. I want to cut my thighs so badly and so deeply I can see fat. I know this is graphic and disgusting, but, maybe, by talking about it, a little of my desperate urge can go away.
My hand literally shakes as I wish to slid it against my skin. I need to see blood. I need to feel… something. Dear Whatever Is Out There, I need to feel something.
What do I do? How do I make it go away? All these feelings, all this pain, this thing that takes control of me, that takes over my body, my heart and my soul?
I can’t. I want to, but I can’t.
How to get through every day. 
Okay, first, choosing to stop cutting has to be about YOU, not someone else. You can’t do it for this person you love, because if you make that the reason, it’ll just come back, probably worse if the relationship ends or goes sour. At the end of the day, you have to stop cutting for YOU. Take advantage of the care and support this person can give you, but don’t make him/her the pillar of your effort.
The best way I’ve found to avoid cutting is to find someone I trust to talk me down. Usually my best friend or my boyfriend. If that isn’t working, or they aren’t available, I find something productive and/or complicated to do that will occupy my mind while wearing out my body. For me, at least,it helps drain the emotional excess and gets something positive done that I can feel good about.
And I’m always hear to talk.